Where are you from? It’s such a common question that most people don’t give it a moments thought – but it can frustrate the hell out of me. My passport is Dutch, most of my family is from the Netherlands, I actually really do like salty licorice, I know how to cycle with an umbrella and occasionally say “Ja, HALLO”. Very Dutch, you’d think. But it’s not that simple; most days I don’t feel Dutch at all.
Having grown up in different countries I actually associate myself more with fellow world travellers than I do with other Dutchies. To answer where I’m from depends on the context and who’s asking. Should it be based on my passport? Where I was born? The places I grew up? Where most of my friends are from? Where I live now? I sure don’t have the short prompt answer people expect when they ask that question.
And I’m definitely not alone in this. There’s a name for people like me: Third Culture Kids (TCKs). Yep, we’re a thing. I recognise myself in the description given by American sociologist David C. Pollock when he explains “A Third Culture Kid (TCK) is a person who has spent a significant part of his or her developmental years outside the parents’ culture. The TCK frequently builds relationships to all of the cultures, while not having full ownership in any. Although elements from each culture may be assimilated into the TCK’s life experience, the sense of belonging is in relationship to others of similar background.” So true, because guess what, most of my good friends are also world travellers. And get ready, because in this age of cheap flights, Internet dating and Skype we’re going to get a whole lot more of these TCKs.
By now the list of places I feel connected to includes the US, Suriname, The Netherlands, Belgium, South Africa, Ghana and, more recently, Malaysia and Australia. Each one of these countries tells a bit of my story and therefore, oh so cliché, has a special place in my heart. All of these places have been my home. I’ve been “from” all of these places, depending on the context. Great for international sporting events though; I always a team to support!
All this moving about makes home a pretty tricky concept. Is home where I keep my stuff? Where most of my friends are? Where I lived the longest? Where I had my first kiss? Or should it be Denmark, a place I never lived and only visited for the first time two years ago – but the place my parents and brother call home. For me, confusingly, it’s all of the above. That’s why that simple question of “where are you from” is so difficult to answer.
So why am I sharing all this with you? I believe TCKs bring an open-mindedness, an ability to adjust quickly, can connect to a wide range of people, have respect for different views and opinions, be accepting of other cultures, are humble, usually have cool fresh examples to add to any conversation from a different part of the world and will just generally be able to get along with diverse people. Which is what I think this interconnected world needs!
Image: Yinka Shonibare, ‘Homeless Child’, 2012
Brain & Guts 